year of 2021

 After 10 years of last posting, I managed to get back my blog.  Now stronger than ever, I want to kept continuing to write on this blog.

Hwaiting!

HEALED

Based dari tajuk entry pada hari ini (hehehe...) sy dengan ini ingin mengumumkan yg sy sudah sembuh!!! Yeay! from the past heart broken. I took me some time to get over him, but I knew eventually I'll let go. He's got a new girl, good for him. I don't want to hold any grudge against him. At least now I am able to smile again. I get the understanding of happiness is depend on myself. We can't let other people determine whether we can be happy or not..

And now I'm dealing with another crucial issue in my life which is my career. But this time being I was still searching for job. I have sent my resume to several companies and hoping that I can get the call for interview. So far I had attend 2 interviews. Both went well. But I let both position passed. Ntahlah, ada sahaja yg tak kenanya.. Mungkin bukan rezeki aku disana kowt. Selain dari itu, I learned that I cannot be to choosey utk bekerja ni.

This upcoming monday, aku ada interview kat Jalan Raja Chulan, KL. Utk position HR kat kilang recron di nilai ni. I was really hoping that I can get job nearby my parents home coz I need to take care of my parents and my siblings. Its my responsibilities to look over them. That's why aku carik kerja dekat2 je. Selain dari tu, aku sangat pissed off bila org pandang rendah towards graduan yg masih lagi menganggur (spt aku nie). Just so you know, bukan aku tak berusaha utk carik kerja I DID okey!! Pastu if nak cari kerja part time, org yg ada kedai2 biasa pun taknak pekerja yg kerja 1-2 bulan je. Dorg nak yg permanent. I have tried them all, tapi tak dapat. DAH TRY OKEY!!

But in the end, it is all about usaha dan rezeki you know. Kdg2 tgk org lain senang je dapat kerja, tapi kita tak boleh nak rasa iri hati or dengki towards them coz Allah dah tentukan rezeki mereka. Same goes with us, yg paling penting is USAHA, DOA & TAWAKAL, insyallah mesti ada jalannya nnt...

DISSAPOINTED

Beberapa hari yg lalu, aku agak happy dengan kehadiran seorang hamba Allah yang aku fikirkan sbg kawan, walaubagaimanapun semalam dia benar2 mengecewakan diri ini. Aku pasrah, thank God aku tidak menyerahkan hati kecil ini kepadanya. Kalau diserahkan juga, mungkin aku akan mengalami kekecewaan yang kedua besar sekian kalinya.

Cukuplah yg aku dah hadapi with mr.rr sblm. Tak mahu pisang berbuah dua kali. Walaupun aku mula menyukai dia, namun Allah Maha Kaya, dia telah menunjukkan aku jalan yang lurus sblm aku terjebak dalam kancah percintaan yang palsu sekali lagi.

Alhamdulillah.

STUPID

Almost everyday I cried because of him. I know, it is stupid things to do when you already done with the other person. Now, I just knew that he's into other girl.. DAMN! So easy for him to get moving on while I'm here still struggling...

I don't want to hate him or whatsoever, coz he's the person that I've once loved. Tak tergamak utk membenci. I couldn't.. T____T. But I knew that he torn my heart really2 bad. I mean, really2 bad.. I was pretty much empty the moment he left. EMPTY.

But the other unexpected things showing up. Abang Firdaus is coming back into my life. He's also having the same situation like me. But he might take it to the highest level, by changing his phone number. Fortunately, he contacting me back. Last night we talked almost 2 hours. He make me smile again. It kindda lessen my pain for a while.

Right now we are friends again me and abg daus after a while didn't contact one another..

I love you..

I truly am. Can't put my eyes to sleep because I've been thinking about you sweetie. I love you but I could not tolerate anymore. Negligence, abandonment, ignorance, its just too much for me. I wish I can be a better person for you, less nagging. I hate when I do that to you and don't want to do things that you hate.

Therefore, we need to stop this. I love you darling. But we need to stop, before we hurt each other. I really hoped that you can read this. T______T It hurts me that we end like this...

Happy Birthday MOm~

Selamat Hari Lahir Mak~

Semalam 5th July is my mom's birthday yang ke 45 tahun. Along ucapkan semoga emak sihat sentiasa dan dirahmati oleh Allah s.w.t sentiasa hendaknya. Amin.....I love you so much mak~ ^^,

Confuse

Smlm is kind of a shock for me. A nice surprise actually. He asked me for in relationship back with him. I was like 'huh?' really? With me? Again? It was out of sudden. It completely blown me away, since that is the thing that I really want to hear most from him for the past 3 months.

I was craving for him, and now he want me back with him. Truthfully, I was of course happy knowing that he still misses me and care for me. But the pain and the scars that he left me with previously. I don't know whether I can accept him back. At least not that easily I guess.

I asked him to give me some time. He told me not to take so much time to think about it. Huhuhu.. T__T Don't know what to do, how to react. Can I stay with him without relationship, but only care for him? Coz in Islam, coupling is HARAM! Well, I really need time to think about it how to tell him this.

Because my sister also not in relationship anymore because of the coupling issue. I really2 respect my sister very much and I really look up on her.. She's one of the good example that I should follow...

Port Dickson..

Baru2 ni my family and Cik Bib's family pergi ke PD. Time cuti sekolah baru2 nie. Omg~ traffic is like crazy!!! I just can't stand sitting inside the car for almost 4 hours to get from Nilai to PD. It was no fun at all.. Nway, it is better off to shut my mouth before anyone else gets annoyed. hehehehe.. (bringing the bad influence I guess) No good at all.

Bila dah sampai sana, kami pun bergambar la. Aku selaku photographer. Fuh, after this kalu gi PD lagi no way aku nak pakai contact lens lagi. Boleh blah.. :P

So among the pictures that I managed to capture.. ^^,

Sesudah sampai~

Lepas dah mandi~

Me and wani (sepupu)

Ikin and Ika (sepupu juga)

Mak dan cik bib~

Ayah dan pakcik Nurin

Haziq dan Hafiz~

Well, it was fun. Tapi aku bantai tido je sepanjang hari kat PD tu..Muahahahaha...tak kire. Sedap kowt dgn angin sepoi2 bahasa tido bawah pokok yg rendah.. perhhhh... Lagi satu sebab is menjaga kulit dari kena sun burn. I swear, I don't want any sun burn on my skin. History taught me well kay....huhuhu. Tak mahu pisang berbuah 2 kali..